CHRISTINA DIMITRA

some, something.

There was I time, when I felt ashamed for how I feel when I felt nostalgic.

I would not talk about it.

And I´d rather hide it.

Today my work became more and more honest.

I remember, when my anxiety kicked in every single night, after writing and expressing myself  and of course sharing it right after.

I wrote deep and decided to share  – but thought  „I wished I could make others feel more motivated, stronger or –  seem totally different, maybe create funny shit, so I felt bad when another person would feel sad while reading or looking at my deep stuff.“

I started deleting it months later… and realized – big failure to do.

People came to let me know „I`ve read this or that sentence and it really helped me.“

As an artist I got to overcome my own fears, able to speak my truth as it is. 

That´s what I know today.

And the truth is, I do not feel ashamed anymore for how I feel and how I think and  also: it makes us stronger if we are able to confront ourselves , able to talk about our deepest feelings and honest thoughts.

the moment you are willing and able to connect with another´s person´s  art work, is the moment you connect with your own truth – feel whatever you feel and able to let it go – and well, that is truely liberating , also. 

For some people – my work is not meant to be, not now , maybe later or maybe never.

And that is okay.

My message is : it is okay to feel pain and to accept your emotions as a part of your human life, because that is the full package and that´s how it is.

I am proud of my struggles.

They made me who I am today.

They made me fight.

It is also really important for me to stay aware of my own fears, aware of my negative thoughts about myself and willing to accept my imperfections and willing to believe in myself, as hard as I can ,  accept my story and my past. But focus on a brighter future. But focus on „motivating myself everday“.

I want to do the best I can. I want to see my visions come true, step by step.

I want to help, more than ever.

I came to a point, where I could not betray myself anymore.

That was the moment I needed to change a lot so radical.

It is okay, if I fail. By failing,  I`ll  learn.

At least I know, I am a better person today.

I am human, first of all.

And I am not perfect.

It is not a shame to feel sad, you are not a bad person if you feel bad,  do mistakes, do a lot of them.

I say, it is important to acknowledge and accept any feeling however it is, so you are able to let go – over and over again.Or request your thoughts – if they hurt.

Nothing will ever be perfect. And nothing is.

And that is kind of liberating, too.

We got so much more work to do.

If we look at the world, there is still so much work to do.

As artists, have the hope and we got the job to create a healthy balance between humanity and politics, betweeen a nightmare and another phenomenon, between love and fear, between truth and error. Between wars and freedom.

And his truth might look different compared to mine.

And maybe her truth earns 1.Mio Dollars a year but…

I have the job to create a space where I am allowed to speak, allowed to share my thoughts, allowed to think out loud , write and create,  allowed to feel how ever I feel,  able to bring different worlds together.

I am aware of it. I can leave something, spread something, make a difference and motivate others to stand up for something that feels right, something that keeps as alive, something that makes it still worth living and makes it still worth trying. I guess even the darkest, most hateful person would say that there is still something like hope for better.“

Art makes us think.

Art makes us feel.

Art reminds us of our dreams. 

Art is endless passion.

Art is a piece of our history.

Art is pain.

Art is hope.

Art is change. Art heals.

Art is a building, a car, art is acting , art is sound, art is singing, writing, talking, art is a book.

Art is struggle.

Art is fear.

And my dream chose me.

As your dream chose you.

And communication is my tool.

A chance to escape, able to share with the world, another possibility – a chance to make us think, to make us grow.

Art is a message in a bottle, art is like water for my soul.

Art is life and life is creative –  like my human mind.

I could not imagine a world without water or art.

Could you?

 

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